“How was your day?”

~ King Ben's Grandma

My Dearest Dude and I were texting this afternoon and she asked me how my day had been. After two very long text messages to her, she told me it was a great story and would make a good post. So, at her suggestion, I am posting the exact story I told her. Swear words and all. I did edit out the names of the other adults in my house. Also, the rather unorthodox nicknames for Ben are never said to him, and are meant with nothing but love. Enjoy!

Mr Bootyhead got up at 5am today. Much better than 2am but still…😠 He doesn’t need to wake up until 6:20am. He ran out to his dirt hole again. Oh well… OMG, Dude, I was so freakin cross-eyed tired this morning that I dozed off in the middle of preparing his meds😧😴😕😂 we have to crush his pills & mix w/water and give it to him with an oral syringe. I was sucking the liquid into the syringe and dozed off. Dozed! Off! I spilled the whole thing and had to start over 😤😩😂 After I put him in the van (NO BUS!😆) I went back to bed. I konked out until 12:30pm😮😮 I swam up a few times but never surfaced. I know I needed sleep but I always feel guilty when I sleep half the day. Old baggage, stubborn old baggage. By the time I was awake awake, it was time for him to come home. He’s been okay… he’s a Turdmuffin Midgetshit so there’s always something, but not too bad. While I was talking to his mama on her way home from work (she walks, it’s 1mile) he suddenly stripped off all his clothes. Right there in the living room. Poof! Naked Ben. Alrighty then…😂😂 I made him put his underwear back on. He’s 9, he can’t just get naked. Yes, it’s home & we don’t care but he’s autistic and may not see the difference between home & everywhere else. So, underpants!

And….after I finally fell asleep last night 12:30am-ish, some drama unfolded in my back yard. Actually, right outside the side door, which is right by my bedroom door. A county Marshall hopped our fence & was standing in the open side door (right by my open bedroom door)….
(1/2)

(2/2)

Younger daughter’s partner just happened to be going down the hall and freaked out. I was passed the fuck out this whole time. I heard about it this morning. Zeus was barking in older daughter & Ben’s room but she was shushing him, figured it was an oppossum or something. Anyway, older daughter got up & talked to the Marshall. He was looking for dude that’s been living at our neighbor’s house. We share a backyard fence. Marshall was checking for a back exit cuz they were there to arrest him. (🎶 Bad boys, bad boys…what ya gonna do, what ya gonna do when they come for you🎶) This guy has been living here awhile. He’s been here before. He’s the ex & father of the woman & adult kids (lots of drama there… another story for another time) Apparently he’s a PEDOPHILE who didn’t register.
The Marshalls arrested him from the front with no trouble.
Can you believe I slept through all this? Luckily I sleep facing away from the door, but still….. AND.. I missed the fun of the take down 😤

So….now you’re caught up😍✨🐞💐💞🌻💖💌🌹😘😘😎

25 thoughts on ““How was your day?””

    1. I’m glad it’s funny even after a second read. You may have noticed that nicknames are kind of a *thing* with me. Just be happy you didn’t get one like Ben.😂 Actually, the only nickname he hears from me is “Babylove”. And you *are* my Dearest Dude😍😍💞🌹🌻🌹💐💌

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      1. LOLOL “Just be happy you didn’t get one like Ben” 😂😂😂. Girl you totally crack me up! 😘💓

        Yes! I totally do nicknames too. I’ve got nicknames for everyone who’s especially important to me 😁. Sometimes they’re aware of it and sometimes they aren’t 😂. And yep, you truly are my Dearest Dude as well 😍. I love “Babylove”, and I bet he loves it too! 💗💗🌹💃🏼🙌🏼❣🍻💞

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  3. I totally agree with the Eartharcher. Very fun read! And thank you for the underpants advice. I’m going to incorporate that into my own life — underpants AT A MINIMUM! I would caution you however on your ironic use of the word dude. I know, I know, I do it too sometimes, and really, I hate to sound like your dad, but studies show that using dude ironically is a gateway to using it without irony, which is not something anybody wants. I know you’re an adult, but just please be careful. LOL

    Seriously though, I do some of my best (or at least favorite) writing when I am writing to a specific person, just as you did here in a text message. It often happens that I’ll be writing a comment on someone else’s post (WordPress, FaceBook, etc.) and I’ll think “wow, this would be a great post.” Hmmmmm. Almost like this comment right here. In this case, however, it’s the basic idea that would make a good post. I wouldn’t just cut and paste this exact comment. But I’d first try to give it a title, for example: “From Text Message to Blog Post: One Great Way To Get Ideas For Your Blog”, etc. Then I would just explain the idea in as few words as possible in the post. That sort of thing.

    I love your Ben stories!

    🙂

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    1. Uh-oh… I heard all about those “gateway” things.🙊 😬 I’ll be careful, it’s just that everyone here in Southern California uses “dude”. I’ll be careful 👍😂😂😂
      Ben is a funny little guy. When he’s not getting on my last nerve, he’s making me laugh.

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  6. I love how what in reality would be a pretty stressful situation, you can still find the funny side – which is a good thing! Sometimes all we have left is the ability to laugh at our lives. I am glad Ben is getting on well at school, and I am glad you shared the crazy – it made me smile in comradery! 😁😁😄

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    1. Oh, I definitely have to find the funny. With four adults, Ben, a dog and a cat all in a house (with only one bathroom 😲) it’s either laugh or cry. Sometimes it all seems so surreal, like this isn’t *really* my life, is it?
      I’m glad you were able to laugh along. I am a goofy, silly person and love bringing laughter to everyone.

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  7. One of my pupils once stripped off in the middle of a newsagents on a shopping trip so I absolutely agree with your advice! You have to laugh! 🙂

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