If you missed the start of this series, you can find it here. A lot of things will be the same or very similar.
I had a fitful night. Crazy dreams that made me wake up to escape them. I don’t know if I’m picking up on all the pain, fear and unhappiness of the collective unconscious or if it was the lasagne I ate before I carb-crashed into a food coma, but it wasn’t as restful as I would’ve liked.
The good news is, I didn’t start my morning until 6:30 and I STARTED IT ALONE, unless you count Zeus. No Bounce! Daughter had Ben in her room. If the 6:30 med alarm hadn’t woken me up, I might have slept until 7:00 or even 8:00. Strange days…
I spent the morning warm and cozy in my bed while the rain poured down outside. Ben stayed with his Mama until 10:00! I could really get used to these Ben-free, quiet(ish) mornings!
So, from 10:00 until around noon Ben hung out in my room. He was watching some fight scene from some movie (about 15 seconds worth) over and over and working himself up. He started doing ‘Bongos’ on Zeus, which made Zeus spaz out and climb on top of me, scratching me with his long nails. (He has black nails and I’m afraid to cut them. I cut a dog’s nail too close once, and once was enough) All of my calm evaporated. Dang it!
I decided that since the rain wasnt going to stop, I might as well go to the pharmacy/grocery store and get it over with. Another one of my prescriptions was ready and I’d been getting texts and auto-calls for a couple of days. Plus there were a few things on the grocery list, cat food being one of them, gotta feed the fur kids too.
As I was leaving, I looked for mail and packages. I had just commented to Daughter about rude people harshing me for not wearing a mask the last time I was at the store. In my mailbox was a delivery envelope. Ah, my friend… my lovely sweet friend, the Juice Angel had sent me something and I knew what it was…
A mask! You can’t see it, but I’m smiling behind there.
My new mask & I went to get the stuff on my list. The TP was gone, but I got the cat food. We still have 2.5 rolls of the good stuff and 3 rolls of cheap stuff, plus wipes so I’m not going into TP panic yet. No worries. The only other thing they didn’t have was a certain brand of bagged parmesan pasta that Daughter likes, NBD. It sure was crowded though. No lines, except at checkout, (6 feet apart please, stand on the red square) and that moved quickly (less than 20 items).
I was back home in no time. Daughter put the few things away while Zeus ran around barking his Big Dumb head off. I hate the barking! At least he doesn’t jump up on people anymore, we broke that behavior. I was going to put Sven in the tub again, but he’s hiding in his ‘house’ today. Have to keep an eye on him.
I hope he’s feeling okay. I understand wanting to hide sometimes.
Around 2:00PM the rain stopped so Daughter decided to barbecue. She was going to do it yesterday, but it rained. The marinade the chicken was in (a garlic & parmesan dressing) tends to make the chicken tough if soaks too long. She got the briquettes going and part of the chicken cooked before the rain started again. We have a pop up awning thing that she stood under, but the smoke and fumes were too much for the grill to be under there. The solution… umbrella.
Ben’s very favorite form of chicken, “fire chicken”.
Unfortunately, he had just eaten a bunch of Cheeto Puffs so he wasn’t really hungry. He only ate a couple bites. That’s okay, he can eat the rest later.
He only has one set meal at home, dinner. It’s the way I raised my daughters too. Let them graze when they’re hungry. I always kept fruit and healthier stuff for the girls. With Ben, we go as healthy as his food preferences allow. When Ben was/is at school, he has access to his lunchbox and the snacks we send, the whole day. They let the kids munch whenever they want to also.
It’s raining hard again. Ben is on the bed next to me with a blanket pulled over his head, watching his tablet with his earbuds in. Zeus is laying on my feet. It’s quiet.
I feel heavy with emotions. Not sad necessarily, but there is sadness. I woke up thinking about this song and it’s been playing in my head all day. It’s kinda sad too. We can try to be cheerful and keep each other supported, but sometimes we need to feel the sadness too.
I’m gonna watch the rain, maybe cry a little bit. I’m okay, really. I’ll be dancing again, because I like to dance. We’ll ALL be dancing again. Hugs to all! See ya tomorrow…