Part 43 ~ The Adventures of King Ben & Zeus the Big Dumb Dog

If you missed the start of this series, you can find it here. A lot of things will be the same or very similar.

4:15 Bounce and so starts another day at Casa Cuckoo … I didn’t get a “Good Morning”, I didn’t get a cuddle, nothing… bedquake, stolen blankets and a demand for “Gramma’s tablet, give it to me.” Sheesh! Not even a please. I handed him the tablet after I made him ask nicely. He didn’t stay long…off to the living room. Then back for another bedquake and very loudly in my ear “Gramma? Turn TV on!” Okay, okay… “TV on! Gramma come living room!” Yes, yes… I grabbed my stuff and went to do milords commands.

He was doing the potty dance in the open bathroom door, staring at the TV. I guess he is unable to use the toilet unless things are just so. I got Avatar playing on repeat and he took care of his business. Then it was my turn.

When I came out, he wasn’t in the living room. I went looking. I found him getting dressed in his room. Vest and tie already on, putting on his jacket, then long pants, socks and shoes. It wasn’t even 5:00 yet.

I went to get coffee and he went to look at himself in the mirror. After a few sips of coffee, I grabbed my abandoned tablet off the couch and tossed it on my bed on the way to get his from his room. As I was taking his tablet to him in my room (still admiring his reflection), Daughter came out of her room. I apologized for him waking her up and told her that she could go back to bed. She said she was taking over living room duty. I grabbed my stuff and went back to my room. Ben was still there, so he got on the bed with me and watched his tablet.

15 minutes later he was in the living room, then back in my room. Very, very hyper and distracted this morning. Cloudy cool weather, so it’s not high pressure, it must just be the ADHD.

At 6:00 he was outside trying to stab holes in the cardboard we have on top of the AC unit to block the window. Daughter yelled for him to stop. Then she got up and went to the door to yell for him to stop. Yelling at Ben, especially an unmedicated Ben is only going to make him get mule-ish and dig his heels in, OR it’s going to make him respond with anger.

I jumped up and went outside and handled the situation. I spent the next 30-45 minutes redirecting his “need to stab, kick & destroy” energy onto cardboard boxes.

He finally started to relax around 7:30. He was watching his tablet in the living room. Around 8:00 he was back in my room saying “Gramma? I need help!” and pointing at his tablet. I asked what he need help with… he just said “Fix it!” It looked like it was working okay to me. I saw that he had his earbuds in, maybe there was something wrong with them?  I grabbed the pair I had and gave them to him. All better. Hurray! Problem solved.

8:30 he, with his tablet and new earbuds, settled down for a chalk session.

I had uncovered Sven and turned his lights on at the usual time, around 6:30, but he was in his pouting corner so I left him there, under the lights, to warm up and wake up. At 7:30 when I was getting more coffee, I took a peek at Sven. He was near his food bowl and he was a mess

7:30 was a little too early to do the whole shower thing. I was thinking about feeding him before his shower today. Especially since he makes such a mess of himself with the blackberries. They’re going bad, so I might as well give them to him before they have to be tossed.

Around 10:00 I put fresh food down for Sven. In the process, I noticed that he had a big piece of skin on his arm ready to come off.

I was tempted, but I didn’t go after it. I did try to get some pictures of him eating.

Then I got the Go Away stare, so I went away.

11:00 Daughter went to her room to stretch out and to charge her devices. She asked Ben if he wanted to go with her and he said yes. I helped him pick up his chalk so he could take it with him. At noon I took his half dose of Adderall to him and went back to relaxing in my room.

I threw my top blanket in the washer with a couple other things. From having a dirty dog, two dirty cats and just dirt in general on it, it was gross! I’m very happy that I make my bed every day and that grossness is stopped by that top blanket…ewww.

2:00 and meds delivered in Daughter’s room. Ben has been out a few times, doing this, doing that, wandering… around 2:15 he said he wanted more Doritos. We were out. I went over to the corner market to get more. He was telling me before I left that he wanted a new Sweeney Todd Barber Chair toy. He doesn’t understand that it’s not something that’s even made, and it certainly wouldn’t be at the corner market. When I got home and handed him the Doritos, he flipped.

It’s been coming all week. I knew this morning that we weren’t going to be able to avoid it today, and I told Daughter this morning that a meltdown was imminent. I wouldn’t call what happened today necessarily a “meltdown”. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think of a meltdown happening from sensory overload. This was more like a temper tantrum. I do believe that he can’t help it to some extent. He’s emotionally immature. I mean that literally. He doesn’t know how to process his emotions. He’s frustrated, he’s bored, he’s disappointed…whatever. It might be his autism, it might be his ADHD, it might be because he’s 11 years old and he’s been stuck in the house since March 13th. We don’t know, and he can’t tell us. He probably doesn’t understand it himself.

We lost one picture frame…broken glass. The event lasted about 45 minutes. Shorter than usual. The past few times it has been hours. He is learning better control as he gets older. Which is good because restraining him is getting harder as he gets bigger and stronger. And we have to restrain him to keep him from running off and possibly getting hit by a car, or getting lost.

It breaks my heart to see him with tears in his eyes, screaming at me to get dressed and go to the store. He can’t even express himself in a way that I understand. All I know is that he’s upset. Even if I’d been able to get this thing he’s screaming about, he’d still be upset. It’s just a sucky thing for all 3 of us.

And for Zeus. Ben hauled off and punched Zeus and Zeus snapped at him. Normally we would NOT tolerate a dog snapping at anyone in our house. Ben has been told over and over that hitting hurts. Maybe the little bruise that’s going to form from Zeus’ tooth mark (didn’t break the skin) on his arm will drive the point home. I doubt it, but maybe.

At 3:30 Ben and Daughter went to Daughter’s room. I stayed on the couch, guarding the front door, just in case he made a run for it, which he already tried twice. Daughter came out to get the rest of her stuff and told me he was laying down with his tablet. She thought it was over. The 2:00 meds were helping.

Ben came out of Daughter’s room a couple times, he even kicked me out of the bathroom the one time I was in there, but he mostly stayed with Daughter. It’s good that they spent time together…after.

At 5:00 Daughter came out to turn the oven on. She had taken chicken breast out of the freezer and I knew he’d prefer that, so I offered to cook. She gladly accepted. She agreed that he’d prefer chicken breasts but didn’t want to leave the calmness bubble. No worries! Just because I don’t cook doesn’t mean I can’t. I’m actually an excellent cook.

Time to end the day’s adventures. It was kinda rough for a while, but it had moments of calm too. Life is like that isn’t it? Come on by tomorrow, Younger is supposed to be bringing me lemon bread tonight. I’ll share… pictures, anyway. Thank you for all your support, it really does mean a lot to me!

 

Oh, and one more thing…

This morning at 6:00AM, when Ben and I were outside, there were four seagulls flying in a circle over our heads. They were calling in that distinct gull way… Being a major LOTR nerd, I immediately thought of this song, and the promise of rest across the sea. I don’t know if those four gulls had any significance. Not everything is an omen or sign. But it’s been on my mind all day. Other things have kinda tied into it. I live 17 miles (27.35km) from the beach. They aren’t common near my house…