If you missed the start of this series, you can find it here. A lot of things will be the same or very similar.
After Daughter was safely at work on her second to last shift, I took my pill and was commenting on a post on and konked out before I sent the comment. I don’t think he reads my blog, but just in case… Sorry about that, Jeff.
Now, sunset pictures… because I can
and also because I can, a couple pictures of that same sun coming up this morning
I woke on my own a little after 4:00… habit. Zeus was first this morning with the sniffing (why is it always the ear??) Then came Ben a minute later, under the blankets for a cuddle. As usual, the cuddle was short and the command came. Off to the living room at the perfectly acceptable time of 5:15. Shocking!
At 6:30 the alarm went off to remind me to do the things. I did the med thing, then the Sven thing. Sven was out of his house
Daughter texted and arrived home as usual. When she asked Ben if he was going to go with her to her room, he said “Stay living room with Gramma.” Dang! I knew why he wanted to stay… he had dumped one of his many, many, many bags of Words out. He was just looking at them for the present, but I knew… I knew. Daughter said “I tried.” with a shrug of her shoulders and went to her room.
Yes, it was Arts and Crafts Time again. Not only did I get to Write The Words, I also got to make three more Warner Bros logos. He finally got tired of me complaining or was just done with the words. Around 8:45 he went to do the chalk thang. Sven also decided to change locations
He moved to the Pouting Corner. And went to sleep.
Ben got tired of the chalk pretty quickly. By 9:30 he was back on the couch, eating Blue Ramen and watching the tablet. Then he decided he needed yet another Warner Bros logo, only this time it should traced on a piece of paper laid over the tablet. (The paper I’ve been using for all these projects is regular printer or copier paper, quartered and printed on one side as flyers for a tutoring service Younger used to work for. We’ve been re-using the blank side for scrap paper) The problems with trying to trace are, the paper is too thick and it’s printed on one side. Ben ignores anything except doing what he wants. It’s pointless to explain that I can’t see well enough to trace the logo, he’ll just point and say “Like this.” So I did my craptacular best, colored yellow and blue, cut out and rolled tape to make it double sided on the back.
Meds at 10:30 and the AC unit switched on. It’s supposed to be a warm week with temperatures in the high 80s to low 90s (30-34 C). Ben doesn’t do well in heat and I most definitely don’t.
Ben watched his tablet leaning against my left shoulder, occasionally sitting up and asking me to write some random thing, for an hour or so. He remembered to plug the charger into the tablet. All the frustration evaporates when I see him really trying, and him remembering to plug the tablet in without me even saying anything is him trying. Heart swells!
He went back to doing the chalk thang a little after his noon Adderall. Daughter stumbled, bleary-eyed past about a half hour later, bathroom bound. I was writing an email, but was feeling very dozy and almost nodded off a couple times. I was afraid I’d nod out with my finger on the backspace button (again!) and erase everything (again!), so I finished really quickly and sent it.
Daughter came back out just before 1:00 with all her stuff. I told her she didn’t need to get up, Ben and I were doing okay. She said she was awake. She’d tried going back to sleep but there was a text message… something, something, something… really angry… blah, blah, blah… and now she was awake. I wasn’t gonna argue. I grabbed my stuff and headed to my room.
Horizontal Time! (for some reason I want to sing that, like “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond) I was giving in to the doze when I heard Daughter yelling to Ben that he should come back inside, that it was too hot to play outside. She yelled to him a bunch of times, and he apparently ignored her. She told me that he was climbing on the wall. Sigh…
I got up and went to get him. He wasn’t actually messing with the wall. He was sitting on top of the five foot high, fence that’s topped with lattice and forms one side of the deck. There’s a branch of the Pecan tree that hangs down there, he was sitting amongst the leaves. I got him to come down and back inside. He came and hung out with me (and Zeus) in my room.
The food that Daughter ordered arrived a few minutes later. Everything except the chicken she ordered for Ben. It was Pizza Hut too, so no excuses. These folks are used to delivery. She called and got it sorted but that made her grumpy. Or grumpier…
She’s been all emotional because she’s had a “thing” for a coworker for forever. This coworker is the one that got special permission for the potluck. Everyone at work thinks they’re dating but they don’t talk AT ALL outside of work. She has confessed her feelings and got nothing in return. I keep telling her that she should just accept a nice work friendship and forget anything else. She keeps wanting to read more into everything though. She doesn’t talk about it to me anymore, but she rehashes every word, every look, every everything. It’s making her unhappy because she wants a relationship with this person. Tonight is possibly the last time she will see or even speak to this person.
She’s BEEN grumpy. I don’t know if it’s her vibes or just the time of day that she takes over, but Ben starts acting out. We do okay most mornings, but around 2:00 the ADHD seems takes over. His meds help a little. He seems Hell Bent on making her angry. And she seems to have zero patience.
I do what I can to keep the peace, but I’m exhausted too. They need to figure out how to be together without pushing each other’s buttons.
I better go ahead and end now. Hopefully things won’t escalate, but they might. Especially since he turned the AC off and keeps taking the cardboard out of the window. It didn’t interest him until he started butting heads with Daughter. Now he’s fixated on it.
Can’t leave without a song though. How about…
Thank you for hanging out. Sorry about things getting a little crazy there at the end. Fingers crossed we can still savage the rest of the day. Come in by tomorrow, it’s gonna be another warm one, and everything might be mellow or everything might be chaos. This IS Casa Cuckoo, every day is crazy.
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HUGS!
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King Ben's Grandma 
Poor Sven! I hope he is Svening again soon 🙂 Sounds like your daughter is going to be going through a lot of change. Change of job, schedule, routine, people (some she cares for more than others). I seem to always take my emotions out on those around me in the house (I’m sad to say). I also think that Declan knows how to get a rise out of me, and sometimes he likes to see what emotions he has “control” of in me. What button to push to give him THAT reaction. It’s never a good mix! It sounds like you have a bit of the same. I hope that your daughter has a great last day at her old job. I hope she gets the closure she is hoping for and really enjoys her new job. I hope that you guys have a great day tomorrow – a beautiful chill day, with a not too early bounce and a beautiful sunset!
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Thank you, Robyn! I missed the sunset… I went unconscious for a couple hours against my will. I guess the lack of sleep and negativity finally caught up to me.🤷🏼♀️ Tuesday is a brand new day. Fingers crossed it’s a fun, relaxing one🤞💗
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Ben remembered to plug in the tablet all by himself! Way cool! 🎶💃💝 coming up on another sunset, hope it’s a beauty 🤗
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Yes, he remembered and he just had a look in his eyes this morning that said “I’m trying…” It was very heartwarming.
I missed sunset…involuntary unconsciousness ☹🤗🥰🦋💖
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My partner has a similar effect on the household. If you come home from work and can’t even say hello to the family before lighting into complaints, it’s going to put a dent in the good vibes..
It’s tough, I know. But, I think it’s extra important as parents of special kids to keep our emotions in check. Kids really do mirror their parents, so even general feelings can effectively compound with them. When you maintain a sense of calm and control, even when you have to be stern, they will feel much more secure and comfortable overall.
Some parents really recoil at the mere insinuation that they contribute to their child’s misbehavior, and it’s really unfortunate. Sure, they may have been assessed with a certain compulsion or tendency. But, those children will be far more manageable and events less extreme when the adults in their lives are in control of themselves.
Not that I’m perfect. We all get our buttons pushed sometimes! Just that if we don’t let the little buttons get big reactions, the kids tend to stop wanting to push them.
How to react is always our own choice.
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Absolutely! I tried to explain to her in a roundabout way that Ben can tell the difference between when I’m huffing and puffing and when I’m really upset. He ignores the first, the latter really bothers him. He’s very very sensitive. And she unfortunately gets defensive very easily and goes on the offense.
She’s off for a week before she starts the new job. Hopefully we can make some repairs to their relationship. 🤞
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Oh, a little work break ought to be just great! Hopefully it will be a time for closure and mentally making space for the new job, too.
It’s not too much of a stretch to say we would like to give our children the best version of ourselves. Part of that is admitting you cannot possibly always do so. Sometimes we don’t have enough spoons to deal, and sometimes we are just plain unknowing/ unaware. Bringing awareness to a behavior is an opportunity to work towards that best person, as long as you can receive what’s being said. True enough, some things are simply difficult to hear about yourself. Additionally, some people have a crass way of bringing things up (Mr. Blunt Force Honesty here) that tends to get a bad reaction even, especially, when it’s quite true.
I will sometimes ask my partner if she’s of a mind to hear my criticism, and I’m actually relieved when she says no, because it saves me from saying it at a bad time. If she is, then it sort of sets it up for having a real conversation, and it’s clear it’s burning on my mind rather than some rude, sideways comment I’m blurting out of nowhere.
One day, we will all learn to talk and listen to each other!
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Communication styles are definitely different. And when everyone is exhausted, we’re not at our best. My Younger Daughter has a tone that just comes across as rude sometimes and I have to ask her if she meant what she said to come across the way I heard it. Most of the time it’s just her tone. By asking I save an argument or hurt feelings. It takes practice to use your brain & not just react emotionally to things. I hate having to have an argument before it calms down to a conversation. I’d rather just skip the argument.
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Children are very quick to feel the vibes. I hope it stays peaceful. Hugs.
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We made it through… barely. No tears before bed and that’s always good.🤗🥰😴
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That’s good. Hope today treats you well.
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I so hope it calms down. That on top of the workload and no sleep is just a combo from hell. If you get through this then we need to get you a UN Blue Coat and get you a job as an international peacekeeper. x
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That ought to be easy after everything else🤣🤣🤣
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He remembered to plug in his tablet! That’s great.
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Little things like that are so big!🥰😍
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Oh, those workplace infatuations. That’s some deep and risky water right there. Granted, Daughter is changing locales, but still. Experience has taught me to let those ships pass in the night. My two cents.
Now, Sven. I know he’s become a major Internet sensation, but I think I might need to have a counseling session with him. He needs to show a little more appreciation for your efforts. Yes, he’s stuck in a box, for the most part, and that’s not necessarily fun. But dude, you don’t have to hunt for your own food and you get regular showers in the magical watering place. Chill out and be thankful your ass isn’t in the desert somewhere… 😉
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I agree with your opinion on the workplace romance. I also know my daughter. She will pine for this person until she meets a new person.🤷🏼♀️
Yeah, Sven could show a little appreciation. I go out of my way to provide a variety of delicacies for him… He certainly belongs at Casa Cuckoo with all the other strange creatures, 4 legged and 2 legged🤪
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