My last post about the parrots was my attempt to focus on the positive things in my life. I was determined to change my viewpoint. Life wasn’t better and I couldn’t change any of the problems but I could change my attitude.
The parrots moved to a different part of the city.
I know, I know… They didn’t move just to spite me. They’ll be back. They roam all over the city, going where the food is. It sure felt personal at the time.
It was kind of the last straw for me and I had to pull back completely. I stopped almost all of my online stuff, I stopped interacting with friends, I just stopped.
Things are still tough, nothing has changed. I’m not trying to force a “happy face”. There is some change coming. Ben starts school on Wednesday. (I know, weird huh?) Anyway, with him back into his school routine and him being away giving me some quiet time, I’m hoping to regather myself. Maybe this headache I’ve had for over two months will ease off.
I’m slowly poking my head out of my cave and reconnecting with my online life. I missed all my friends but I know everyone understands that sometimes one has to take a break and step away. It’s still hot. I’m still poor. New stresses have been added and none have been taken away. But, but, but… I don’t feel quite as fragile. I’m not as frustrated, angry or generally BLAH.
I’m not gonna force happiness but I’m not going to quit looking for it either.